I had a conversation with a friend the other day, the conversation was convicting, encouraging and challenging all at once. Exactly the way it should be! During this conversation we discussed a few things and I would like to address one of the topics that we discussed.

Consistency, Interaction, and Honesty

Kelley and I have been privileged to be involved in a few different small group bible studies as have some of you. My belief is that small groups are not something to be taken lightly. They should be a part of every believer’s Christian walk. Corporate worship in a larger setting, like on a Sunday or a mid-week bible study is essential as well, but they are somewhat different in purpose and intent than a small group study. Consider the model Jesus left us. He had 12. Yes, we are given accounts throughout the gospels where Jesus is dealing with multitudes. He feeds them in Matthew 14, Mark 6, John 6, and Luke 9. He heals them in Luke 6, Matthew 12 and 14, Mark 3 and He teaches them. Probably the greatest teaching He gave is the Sermon on the Mount.

Yes, there are many times when Christ was with many. But almost as a rule when in these situations Jesus would turn to the crowd and challenge them in a way that would whittle that crowd down real quick. Jesus has such an occasion in Luke 14 where Jesus says to the crowd “If anyone comes to me and does not hate his own father and mother and wife and children and brothers and sisters, yes, and even his own life, he cannot be my disciple.” Imagine being in the crowd and hearing this! I imagine that this thinned the herd rather quickly, separating the fans from the followers. There were times where He would get in a boat and cross over to the other side to be alone with the 12. The point being that Jesus had his most intimate human fellowship with a small group of people.  

I believe we should use this as an example. Studies have shown that the average person has about 125-150 friends or acquaintances and in that context there are subsets of “friends”. For the sake of space and time I’m not going to break it all down, but at the top of this friend pyramid you will find primarily family, people you have weekly interchanges with, followed by people you have monthly interchanges with. All the groups need tending, all need maintenance, all need care or like an untended plant- they will die. The point being is that we are able to be more connected to people when we function in a smaller group. I am not advocating that you or I dispatch with weekly corporate worship and church attendance, we’re instructed to do so, but we also must supplement these things with a small group dynamic. Jesus knew this. He designed humans and our inbred need for community which cannot be satisfied in large group setting. Inherent in the triune nature of our LORD is community, fellowship and intimacy. He was well aware of the need for intimate relationships. Unfortunately the world and pop-culture have co-opted the words intimate and community for far too long. We think of intimacy and we typically think of sexual encounters. We think of community and more often than not that conjures up images of hippies sitting around a fire singing a collection of Bob Dylan tunes while wearing hemp clothing. Neither of these pictures are what Christ had in mind when he created these ideas. He gave us the model so that we should follow suit.

How do we have effective small group ministry?

Consistency: We strongly believe that one key ingredient to a flourishing small group is consistency. Jesus tells a man in Matthew 8 to “let the dead bury their dead”. Is Jesus saying that this guy can’t bury his father? No, He is telling this man to take a look at his priorities. Are you…am I, truly invested in following Jesus? Do we want to really put the effort in where it is required? Does this mean that life doesn't happen and we neglect a sick family member or a job in favor going to bible study? I don’t think so, but is there always something interfering with your commitments? If you desire to make meaningful connections with other brothers and sisters in Christ you must remain consistent. If someone only attended class once every week would anyone be surprised when they didn't get the material? I don’t think so.

Interaction: Jesus interacted with the people He ministered to on both the large and small scale. He got very close with those He healed; remember the spit in the eye healing, that’s close! He engaged people on the streets, in the temple and on the hillsides. He questioned people and got them to think and to respond. What does this accomplish? A couple things, first it cultivates an environment in which people are free to be part of the conversation. As people begin to interact and get involved in the process it encourages others to do the same. Second the idea of interacting almost forces you to stretch yourself and step out of that proverbial comfort zone we are all so well acquainted with. Anyone who has spent any time in a gym or a PE class knows that growth does not come without stretching and some discomfort, but both of these things produce great results if utilized properly.

Honesty: Honesty in any facet of life is necessary but in the realm of the small group it is typically only a by-product of practicing the first two pieces.  No one expects someone to come into a group and open up and share their life with people they don’t know immediately.  Some people are quicker to open up and let others into their struggles and joys, while others take time. Neither is wrong, they are simply different. And just because someone projects in a certain way may not mean that they are being genuine. Be sensible and use discernment, but be open to reality that the things you have experienced have been allowed for a very specific reason, and that is almost always for the benefit of others and for your spiritual growth.

There are many other pieces to the puzzle of small groups. Maybe we’ll write about some others later down the road but for now these are the main topics. Consistency, interaction and honesty. If we all applied ourselves, through the power of the Holy Spirit, to these things in our small groups we would be amazed at what we see the LORD do. Obviously this has been written with The Bridge in mind. Please pray for The Bridge. Please consider these things and use this post as an instrument by which to measure yourself. As Paul encouraged us in 2 Corinthians 13, examine yourselves!

Please be consistent in your walk with Christ. Please interact with Him on a regular basis. Please, over all, be honest with yourself about the state of your union with Christ. 

Grace & Peace

Chris & Kelley